C'est la vie

Sharing A Case: Wilms Tumour

2010-12-06T09:48:00.005+08:00

Last night, i have had a dream...it was an odd incidence which i actually dreamed of a Wilm's Tumor.

in a random day,a toddler was brought to the emergency department because of an irregular mass felt by the mother on the left hypochondrium. and, the mother also added the toddler has not passed motion for quite some days with no urinary system problem.

as typical student, we are interested with something presented abnormally rather than normal. hence we approached the caring mother with a sympathy tone and ask about the toddler. after a while, we were palpating the child's abdomen and felt the mass. it was a firm to hard, irregular oval shaped mass, sized 5X6cm, poorly demarcated margin, located on lower left hypochondrium and upper left lumbar region of the abdomen.

initially,the caring mother was expecting the mass was just feces secondary to the constipation, however, as the attending approaching, the facial expression of the mother changed and become worried. slowly the tears was running down unstoppable. as the they delivered bad news to the mother, they had suspected the mass was actually a tumor, Wilms tumor and further investigation is needed to confirm the diagnosis.

any parents would like to see their child or children always at the pink of health. they were working tremendously to keep their children comfortable and saving the best for them. we felt bad for the sick child and the poor mother, besides sending our regards and show our sympathy to the mother, we barely can do anything. Giving hope to the mother seems to be the wrong move to pinch in. hence, wishing them and hoping the treatment will cure the child are the least thing we can afford. May God bless the child and the family.

Sympathetic Tears

2010-09-29T20:51:00.004+08:00

Grayish background decorated the usual baby blue sky that i've seen daily, accompanied by the symphony of thunder and the wheezing of wind. Dark, black, massive cloud, sign of Stratocumulus is incoming. at this time, everyone's pace seem to appear faster than usual, marching impatiently towards all the entrances of the hospital. "Cepatlah, adik" shouted by the worried mother. in her hands, holding side by side, there were a bag and some water bottles in a basket. from the observant point of view, someone has been sick and brought to the ward. she is just non other than a typical visitor to the sick.

in the ward, the crying pitch of the unwell toddlers has broken the silence.....
i saw worried faces, anxiety parents, exhausted mothers, busy doctors, caring nurses were scattered all over the space. voice of comforting and support has been filled up the entire room. i was there, staring towards the crowd and search for calmness. rarely, it can be found! added with the routine morning prayer. and it was melancholic. i was thinking. as the pitch moved to a higher frequency, the cleaner was shaking her head to show the helpless circumstances, they just could share the feelings of the patient but not to their pain. She walked off and continue her duty.

the world can come out 10 points, how a doctor can be a good spouse or draft another 10 points to mock the doctors. this is the realistic world as we are living within, as student, we were already trained how to deliver a bad news, no matter what is the degree of the worst, it has to been passed on. unnecessary tears and touch is avoided, because it has to keep a certain gap from a doctor and the family member. i don't know about the others, but i choose not to show over sympathy or attention to a particular patient because of what they are going through but rather looking for other way to pinch in. this does not make a person being cold, or mean but another sadness or grief has serve no objective towards the sick.

what we are doing now is a way of learning, and behind those sympathetic tears, it has its own story to tell. we learned the way our lecturers had taught us, and we hope that we learned it well, and some day we can stand alone and perform well in the field. but, what should we bear in mind is, besides the lecturing and classes taken, patient is the one who taught us the most. without them we were just a bunch of human poking each other to draw some blood, scanning each other as if we have tumour and taking history from one another as if we are the story teller. to whom we actually appreciate the most is our patients. Maybe we don't see them after they got discharged, but during the staying, they are part of us. we hope they can get well and leave the ward. we share their story in the cafeteria, we laugh at them because they are naive, we feel sympathy when they become more sick, and finally we come to a point of realization that, what ever we do daily in our life is and for the patients. we are bonded with them since the first day we step into the clinical posting.

we are the students who were wandering in the wards everyday and presented as fools in front of our lecturers because, we are dumb in our way. i really hope that, 3 years from now, as all of us graduated and posted all around the country or world, and all the scoldings we had taken and the tears we had shed, is a way to mold us and make us be prepared and enable us to face the world in real.

Historian

2010-09-04T18:27:00.001+08:00

It's just like a historical day, familiar and 'knowing' was creeping my neurons inside my skull. I tried to elicit every single storage in my brain and compare with the day. Slowly it recalled and reminding, it was shooting the day she left. My heart was freezing, cold and senseless that day. I was stunted in the middle of noway without a goodbye message from her. what i can recalled is, i was roaming and biting the lamp pole with some uncertain rhythm. i have forgotten, the color of her iris, the shirt she wore, the high heels she likes the most and the smell of her perfume. not a single thing of her i can remember. i let her go...disappears~

History repeats itself. No, it's not, it is the mistake that keep repeating. it was the exact setting, but played by a different being. Here she goes, leaving this place for a brief vacation. She left without a word of adieu. Was she wearing her darling bracelet, or bringing her travel dairy along? No one knows..mysterious ..It supposed to be a saddening scenario, but no one was reacting as it supposed to be. it's against the script-play. the summer wind blew away the dust of poignant, blended and mixed with the air and up-high. i exhaled.. disappeared~~

my mind is loaded with all these history books..its time to place them on the shelf, let go is the hardest things to do. Im signing off..gone!

Kampung Nelayan_Tg. Dawai_Kedah Darul Aman

2010-07-04T18:44:00.005+08:00

Community Diagnosis Posting, 2010

Hat Yai, Thai

2010-04-13T23:08:00.005+08:00

think globally act locally

2010-03-21T18:07:00.004+08:00

well, its exam season again. this is the only period that i have time to write, write and write. things around me become more magnifying as well. i can pick them up and pause on them. people will laugh of my insanity or mock me like a fool, and i laugh at them because they just don't SEE it. in here, i usually dont talk on something that sounds pleasant or joyful. if some of you has been reading my posts for all this while you will realise that the tone that i used mostly, is regularly melancholic and sarcastic. occasionally, it will be more sympathetic, and rarely joyful. why? i think most probably, happiness and joyful moment usually we will remember and secure them inside our encephalon or myocardium. on the other hand, those angry and saddening scenarios will be placing behind and get forgotten. thus, here it is, i have recorded most of them. somehow i believe it has something that worth learning and remembered.

think globally act locally! here, it doesnt apply for any health purposes nor 'gotong-royong' motive. its just something that happened in my surrounding and it has become more obvious recently. however, it has been reversed. at first, we deny all the facts of politics, power, fame or something in return, because they cant be positioned in this community. we don't mention about hierarchy as well, it looks as ugly as those in front. here, we only talk about teamwork, giving and respect one another.

i like a Chinese quote, 'don't judge a person with a coloured spectacles'. at your position, you shall not see only the bad but ignore the good. you shall find the lost and guide them. for those who are ignorance and rebellion, please follow the flock and stay as one. don't split with your kind and done ridiculous. you will not be praised but be ruined.

you should give rather than receive. you shall not be 'everything is me'.and, i do understand the pressure and burden you bear with. share your stress and your unwillingness with your peers, and shall not be showered upon your flock. take advice and away yourself from emotional duties. it will decay your supportive poles. believe on rules and regulation, no one shall be above it. sometimes being an idiot is a blessing, there is no necessity to fight back.

last but not least is respect one another. it is hard for everyone, i agreed because i also get myself struggled within it. but at least we tried, care less if the others don't respect you. maybe it is not an ideal advice from one who respect-less the others. but you are different, you need this quality. in return you will be respected.

im writing this is not to against anyone, and zero motive to lean on somebody. it is the thing that has been magnified somewhere that i recalled of. please don't take this personally and negatively, it is only a person's thought. i hope that you will be stronger and 'global' in the coming days. all the best...

the one who called me fridge face!

2010-03-20T08:50:00.005+08:00

Picture of Shaun Ng

a simple dedication to you, jess,

i tried to hate you, indeed im trying! unfortunately, i failed to hate you... as the morning sun shines upon my face today, i think of you. i think of your little evil smile, and is your smile that bugs me this morning. thinking of you is like a morning call, reminds me daily, so that you are always in my mind. i like the way you talk, the way you smile, the way you act, and of course at the top of those i like you are always who you are. you are pure, but not as pure as the driven snow, instead you have a little evil in you. indeed, it is the little evil that makes you outstanding from the other roses, your charming buds won the the hearts of the hundred bees. gosh, i start to miss you, girl. now, im wondering when will be the next time we go for a walk, or perhaps dinner at The Little Cottage and footing on the sandy beach...how i wish that moment will be realised in a blink time..how i wish....Jess, i missed you, so much......

if someone had read this post, i can assure that they will be so confused and shocked. an unintentional made rumour. this is because of a FRIDGE! and we are in the middle of war.....well, apparently im kidding here...anyway, jess is real charming! seriously...

last sight

2010-03-17T12:24:00.002+08:00

you are a fool!! you had spent some pleasant moments with your consort, is that the only thing that you care the most?? your erotic vocal utterence is disgusting, anyway! you are still an idiot! you had obeyed the law of nature, but when liablity is to be spoken. you are like an ostrich, hiding your pea-sized brain into the sand. hundreds of preys are out there. but you rather believe the most dangerous species will take care of your poor cubs. undeniable, most of the homosapien do have the feeling of love and sympathy, but some are more cruel than your fellow preys. they are inhuman human, show zero mercy upon your innocent cubs. interference of their territorres, will make you pay up a lively debt.

the first time i saw you, was your pure innocent look. when i took the last sight on you, you are already a piece of art~~ how pathetic??

Brief Breath...

2010-03-15T19:57:00.004+08:00

discontinue breathing... hunger, thirst for the refreshing air. letting effort to get completely burn and fight for every molecule of air...brief and rapid ventilation of lung seems to be the hardest thing to do. it is disturbing, both emotion and physical. rational mind seems never taken stood at that very fine second. it is the voluntary mindset that go against the auto-system. it is like the familiar story of Newton's. how can you stop the apple from falling down?? no you cant, eventually and practically!! perhaps, someday you can pause the working clock or stop every single unwanted particle enter your nostril. it is crazy, and impossible! you just have to keep go against your will, and take that idiotic breath, very brief and stupid breath. till it is fully exhausted and ceased in whole. sometimes, you just hope that the Ondine's curse will shower upon you. because once it is there, you just have to REMEMBER to breath!

what a lousy thing to talk about!

2010-03-10T17:15:00.008+08:00

everyone is talking about responsibilities... responsibilities of all things, seems like a bundle of rubber bands to me. and eventually it transforms to a rubber ball, and it turns gigantic when time goes on. I'm not really good in having a good shape of a rubber sphere but rather a manipulable rubber triangle or even square, i don't know. when responsible is hung over your shoulders, that's it! the story begins..at first you are so keen to take every step to ensure everything is as good as it supposed to be. and after a while, you start to believe that the things you did, aren't that perfect for there is no whole perfection. then you become doubtful to your own stand, and you give in finally. well,not really up to that level yet, but soon to be deposited on the judgement desk. it is non like the other tasks, classical and boring. "keep it done!" or far more than just done. but rather in a little additional of sympathy and consideration. after all is the quality that's paint the picture. when you are good in that, you remained. if not, you are out of the Colosseum. and the rubber ball or yours become clumsy as it became bigger and weighted, it pulls down your speed and make you stuck and left you suffocate at that very spot. it is not ideally to become manipulative, but it rather be or it is merely another option. it is the yin-yang that we are live within, if you found some breakthrough from there, jump out! and you will realise that actually this world has strenghten itself overwhelmingly bad. you know what? someday the earth will somehow find out that it isn't that round after all.

Substitution of Cola by Corona!

2010-02-04T00:28:00.007+08:00

Drinking is more to enjoy the circulation of the spirit inside the oral cavity rather than get drunk and lied down in the middle of the street. some people do ask me that, why do you like alcohol so much. for sure, i like it not because the alcohol can boost up my mood or make me more like a man. but it is the taste of the spirit which make me bound firmly with it. the bond cannot be told in words but it can only be experienced when you take a sip of it . stir your oral cavity with the aroma of the spirit, and then the bond will be made. how sweet is the taste.... get up! Don't get drunk!!!

Leaving Us

2010-01-12T08:33:00.007+08:00

its a saddening scenario when I'm about to draft this post...

The post that took me almost a month time to start the first line. I know it is the time to over it, to accept that it has left us.

it took part on that very gray evening, when she took her very last breath....and say goodbye!

i wasn't here. and i didn't know about it only after 3 months of her leaving...

i thought I'm strong enough to accept the fact of death. but it isn't. my subconscious has recalled back those memorable moments we had since it was a little pup...she was an adorable and brave dog, even when she was small....

i still can remember when she was at 3 months old, she attacked and killed a scorpion. and stepped upon it with her paw.she was true hunting dog. she had hunted down plenty of lizards, frogs and even pigeons. and because of this, it has taken her away from us. 4 months ago, at her regular prey, she had picked up a toad as her prey. she never knew that it was poison. she had struggled from the effect of the toxin and left this world after 2 days. she lied down on its very spot where she usually position herself as a guard dog. though you had left us physically, but your spirit and image will remain forever in our heart...may you Rest In Peace, my dearest companion, Lindie!

giving

2009-10-16T09:56:00.008+08:00

giving....

first ever given gift

how precious and wonder

expect nothing

but a little more of care and love, in exchange.

giving....

it will never be the same .

emotionally, physically, spiritually

bounded tightly

never being separated.

giving....

was deaf dumb and blinded

sip by sip of lies

masking the origin of truth

still in love

giving.....

arrival at its boundary,

the point of realization.

it was bitter and sour

regret seems never took its place

giving....

parts of heart filled up the square tile

dripping tears flooded the corner

no!...but it was too late

hoping for recovery but it never comes

giving.....

it comes so far

yet it breaks like a big bang

giving and give in depict a priceless deal.

is it a worthy gift to give away....?

only the person knows...

adopted from a radio show...pls click and listen( Cantonese version)

a little ugly '12' of females...

2009-09-17T20:30:00.006+08:00

Female,women, ladies or girls have a very unique relationship with numbers. this relationship starts even during the embryonic period of life. no offence to the ladies, but there is a little ugly fact of numbers bonded within them. for instance number 12, i would like to say 'nasty' no.12. why 12? 12 can simply resemble lots of affairs ie, a dozen of beer, a year and so forth. so, the basic question here is, what is the blame of 12 within the opposite sex of male??

1. in 12th weeks of pregnancy, sex of the fetus can be determined. if the 'fruit' isn't there, means it is a girl. this is simply because the little thiggy is supposed or originally to be developed into female genitalia if the factor( mullerian inhibiting substance,MIS) isn't present.

2. at 12 year old, they usually 'look down' on guys because they think that they are tall and presume that guys are retarded in growth...

3. anyway, normally, 'invited guest' comes to visit them also during age 12

4. the 'visitor' comes 12 times a year....typically

5. due to this, they usually undergo at least 12 times of mentally unstable a year...psychologically disturbed ie, moody,stress, aggressive, hot temper....

6.hence, this explain somehow they like chocolates once a month of 12 yearly...

7. besides biological experience, 12 o'clock is the limitation of girls given by another women named mother. " you better come back before 12. if not, no more 2nd chance, you know the rules!" does it sounds familiar to you, ladies???

8. girls ask for favor from dad in 1.2 minutes. if girls ask for favor from mom it will take more than 12 minutes...

9. girls has a check list for her dream guy, 12 small boxes are there for the ticks...only if they are kind enough, if not 21 boxes will be there.

10. most of the young females go to bed before 12, if not they will get upset for their skin...

11.this is for guys. if you happened to rely on ovulation period counting for 'happy moments' without taking any other precautions. please avoid day 12 till 18 of ovarian cycle if you are not ready to be a father. if you are reckless, i can only wish you HAPPY FATHER'S DAY.

12. do not question and find fault in any of these 12 matters including this line with the girls. this is simply because you have 1/12 chance to get into trouble. and she will remember you for the least 12 days, or longer 12 months....

zero offence...

randomly random

2009-09-05T21:07:00.004+08:00

well, this is another randomly random post of mine...

a week after 'the brain's weeks' and without a moment for gasping, we have been thrown into the hormone's pool....dun even have a short time actually to 'phew...' or said it loud, 'yes, finally the exam is over'. but rather, struggling and drag our own feet unwillingly to keep tract before 4th week has arrived, another exam week. what is this?? i mean...anyway, forget about it. it's not important anymore...

adam lambert? kris allen? sounds familiar right? but it also sounds fusty, isn't it? frankly speaking, i just finished the finale 1 hour ago. adam, the true star but unfortunately he is defeated by a humble, shy, lack of confidence 23 year-old married student, kris allen. shocking? nope, definitely he can sing, a musician, he has the 'charming' face and most important he won the hearts of american. so, absolutely doubtless.

another interesting matter that snap my attention is the 'sacking' incidence. fascinating huh? it's like two first grade students who are fighting for the front seat. ridiculous! stood upon the nation and act like kids. but, this is it, the tricks, playgrounds, of the powerful people. we, the spectators can only seat still and watch the play. and hoping for some glamorous plot and jet-setting peak. so again, is that familiar phrase that we typically heard, " stay where you are, more interesting stuffs are up next"..bla, bla, bla....

and here are some of my photograps for sharing....cya in next post! the classics...

I Have A Dream To Reach

2009-07-10T23:20:00.004+08:00

When I was a little kid, I have always dreamed to be a doctor. This is because at that time I have the mindset that doctors are very cool and I simply wanted to be one of them. Then, when I had got into primary school, the ambition of being a doctor was still in me. But, somehow I just didn’t know the path to be a doctor. The saddest thing was, I don’t even like to study no matter how hard did my parents forced and persuaded me. I have forgotten how many tuition centers that I have visited and the time that I have promised my parents to get at least 5 As in UPSR. But in the end, I have got a terrific and ridiculous result for it. I was so doomed at that moment, helpless and regret has filled up the entire atmosphere. And, besides that I can sense that my parents’ hearts have been sliced into pieces, heart ached and cried in tremendous pain. Moreover, the only great ambition which is in me was also drowned into the ocean of Pacific along with the result. My dream had ended, I whispered to myself.

From then, the naughty child has turned to an evil teenage. When I came to the secondary school in the year of 2001, I have been placed into the second class from the tail, a class that composed of varieties of students. I have been looked down by some of my friends, and among them was my own buddy. Though it was hurt and never felt good, I was still a lazy chap, never completed my homework and always get punished. And I’m still missing those days when we were asked to squad at the balcony to finish up the homework. But, I hated myself for the entire year, the year of darkness and blind folded. I hated myself for being looked down and discriminated. I hated myself because the teachers never listen to us but to the ‘good’ students. I hated myself because we are always mocked and become jokes by the ‘good’ students, teachers and seniors. I hated myself because we were always being known as the ‘bad’ side. Thus, since then I have chosen to be ‘bad’ instead of ‘good’, because I will never be the ‘good’ or should be I didn’t even want to be good.

I learned to be humble from their sight. I learned to be strong under their laughter. I learned to be patience in their mocking. And I learned the meant of dignity under their arrogant. Today, on my shoulders, there are dozens of medical books. I’m not proud because I’m in med school. I’m not proud because I’ve regained back my very own ambition and able to realize my dream, but I just wanted to thank God who has positioned me into those hard times. If not I’m still the chap that always get punished in my entire life.

‘No more regrets, and never say it’

A true story grabbed from a medical student…

into the Historical State

2009-04-12T19:57:00.004+08:00

upon holiday...

2009-04-02T16:20:00.008+08:00

on that evening, everything seems to be fine and proceeded according to what has been contrived. smile, a sweet one, was carved on everyone face. after 8 weeks of hard labour, finally, the long awaiting break was arrived. unfortunately, not everyone claimed it with the enjoyable and exciting manners.some would like pause for a week, as granting himself a study-free moment. and few of them framed it as another lifeless days, continue swimming in the pool of books. that day, friends, waving hand to one another as exchanging the farewell massages, at least for a week. anyhow, some of them were busy packing up their kilograms of notes and dozens of book into their 'king-size' luggage, and bringing them along for the vacation. as, for me

wishing you all, have a pleasant break, and see you all in a week time.

another random photos...

faces ...part 2

2009-03-19T20:29:00.004+08:00

random...part 1

2009-03-17T23:49:00.011+08:00

finally, this blog is updated!!! hey there everyone, sorry for this 'dying blog', finally it has been revived. recently, i've been to Kampar and Ipoh, Perak for the Levites tour.So, here are some updates from the marvellous trip i had last week.

let this be the part 1. and hopefully i can update the subsequent post as soon as possible. cya!

victory

2008-12-17T17:20:00.002+08:00

yes...the victory is in hand. finally the war is all over for this year. we shall fight again when the time has come....for this moment let us enjoy the victory...cheers warriors and fighters!

see you folks..happy holiday!

prepare for the last call...

2008-11-08T19:15:00.007+08:00

it is time. the time for battle. a long battle...

the battle that determine my destiny. i call for all the well armed fighters to fight for this battle.

i awake the strong warriors to combat with me for this very last call of the year. will i gain the victory??? yes! the victory is awaiting for me...and im coming for it.

here are some of my photography updates.

...

2008-10-03T10:48:00.007+08:00

untitled...

the setting was in a room, a 180ft2 room. 18 ft from the entrance door, there was a guy sitting there alone. the room was dark, empty and it is quiet. only the 20inches bulb was lighting the entire room. silence... totally silent.soundless, only the sound from the moving machine of a fan. sweeping the air. no one, besides the little insects which attracted by the light bulb and land on it. the guy was staring around with no purpose, imaginary friend appeared and descried to him the beauty of the world out there. but he seems to have no interest in those. he was wondering...

far away from the room, a 7 feet clock tower rang, 11 times, indicated it was 11pm at night. but it meant nothing to the guy. the sound of the bell was just some additional of melody into the silence of the night. in front of him, there was a cup of hot coffee, vaporizing. it is because of the smell of the coffee that made him feel that he is still connected with the world. the sense of smell makes him stay awake in this long passing night. he had completely loss count with the cups of coffee he had taken.sensitivity against numbers become prominent to him in sudden. every single object on the desk is like taking their own coordination, arranging themselves neatly and steadily on the the desk. why alone? this was the question arose for thousands time. but it seems to have no definite answer for it.

the gentle wind blew from outside, it was just like a gentle hand tapping on the shoulder of the guy and persuaded him to rest his day. his body was tiring, feeling tonnes of burden on his back. "is time for me to rest, i think", he mumbled to himself. finally, he was on his bed, the eyelids were closing, yet his mind was asking, "why alone?" there is no answer for it, thus, let him rest and maybe in his dream he will finally meet the answer. let him rest the wind spoke gently..."good night my dear. you deserve a complete rest", it added.

trash!

2008-09-28T17:15:00.003+08:00

down hill,experiencing through uncountable obstacles. thousands and thousands of contemplations come across at a second of flash.wondering, marveling, pondering and keep puzzling every single thoughts that could be captured at that second. think! arguing and struggling with your inner self, fighting and stabbing oneself to shine for your own. logic? sane? relevant? no! no more, neither any one of them could be or ever be localised in those ways. irrational thoughts are overwhelmed the entire mind. why it's just hard to let it go?

living in such a way, is like living in such a waste. throw away the trash! empty your bin with those junk,undesirable qualities. who do you think you are? a king? yes, an idiot and pathetic king to yourself. ego makes you look like a donkey's ass. looking yourself like the highest is just a mirror of degradation. solving matters with anger? picking up every single mistakes of peers? winning in ridiculous arguments? those are as stupid as you are. is acceptance and tolerance really hard for you, my dear friend? is it? why would you want to live in such a way? or you are just simply escaping from the reality? we hear from you day by day but you had betrayed the meaning of peers. for now, at least we are peers still, please don't betray the beauty of it. they are all trash. you have no way to keep them all the way long.

down the memory lane, it is dark, couldn't recall them. accompanied by horrid feeling, fearful tears, and disastrous sweat had watered the flash of the body. another pathetic experience, broken heart, along with those regretful scenes. what a shame! are you going to crumble your dignity to them? what a shame, my dear friend! stand on your feet and proclaim your self-esteem. that was the last thing i ever told you, yet it's still fresh in my mind. however,now, you can never be the same. i think i know you but im still wondering the fact. you are like a stranger to me yet you presented a familiar self, sadly, i know you no more. im sorry! sorry for the scenes we brought to you, sorry for the influential factors from us. now, we are aware of our speech, our act and also the thoughts of us. we will never be the same like it was before.please, i urge you my friend, take away the negative and empty the trash bin. it has reversed the pureness of your mind and took away the precious friendship of us. please...........

awaken, gosh..........it's just a dream. but, it is so true that im actually experincing them in my life. i think i had wondered to much for that. it's still dark out there. and let it be dream again.good night!

worries

2008-04-15T17:04:00.005+08:00

worries huh??

i bet all of us do have worries,don't you? what do worries bring to you? is it just only the feeling of restless, uneasy or just simply nervous when things went wrong. or maybe, it had turned you up side down, you can't do your work in the proper way, losing your rational, narrow thinking and so forth. so, what did worries mean to you?

i have a friend and worries mean a lot to him. he is a worrier. i knew this guy for quite sometimes and he is an origin of worrier. all i can say of him is, he worries. he seems to be worried for all the time,he never find peace in him, he is unsecured. to him, everything has three angles to look at, the front, the in between and the back. however, he always look at the back of everything. and we asked him, why? he said, the front part of the thing is what we can see. The in between part is something we not sure. But, the back part of the thing, is the scariest part, we never know what is it all about. due to this point of view, he has become a true worrier. Yet he is still a great friend of us.

there is a question in everyone of us after we get along with him for quite sometimes, for me i have forgotten how many times i did ask the same old question, why do you worry? but, i never ask this question for a period of time after the time we say goodbye to each other 2 years back. today, i was sitting alone on the sofa and enjoy a cup of hot Milo,out of sudden, i look at the door of my apartment and had a thought of this worrier. the thought was funny, but it also reflect the impact that this worrier left for us. the three angles of views of things, just like a door.

last time when we were at those children days, we never get worried. we just have the feeling of afraid but not worry. but, this fellow is different. he did get worried at those days, he worried about the homework that haven't completed, the teachers' mood, the coming examination and so on. frankly speaking, we don't care those things at all and think that he is one of his kind, so we seldom mixed around with him. fortunately, or unfortunately, we were in the same secondary school. woouoo...that time, more things for him to worry. i still remember there is once, we approach him and check him out, whether he is still the worrier. in our expectation, he is. and at that moment, he told us the door-concept of looking things. surprisingly, we didn't laugh instead we were sitting down and listen to him.

here the story starts, he said a door has 3 parts. first of all is the surface, this is the part where we can see, so do the problems that we will face, hence the solution is always be there. The second part of the door is the lock, whether the door is locked with its frame, that is the part. thus so does the problem that we are not sure how does the solution is. and the last part,is the back part of a door, we can't see what is behind it, it is beyond expectation and prediction, and so do the things that might happen to us.and here is the angle that he concerned the most. therefore, he get worried all the time.

since then, we never taken things easily. we think of the door when problem strikes. and,sometimes we help him to find solutions to get rid his problems.this is how our relationship is built. it might sounds like a drama, but honestly our life is a series of drama. ups and downs, that we can never expect. so directors, direct your plays well. cut!..well done!, that's all for this scene.

all have been done

2008-04-13T22:20:00.005+08:00

yes, all have been done! CA is over. "prison break" season 1 and 2 has completed. what else??

it is kind of weird feeling in me at this particular second of time. it is so indescribable and unidentified kind of feelings. never want to experience this kind of moment. worse still never think about i will be situated in this setting.it is awful.

this is a break to all of us, as usual a week of term break after the continuous assessment. the word 'all' means everyone of my friends are on their holiday back at their lovely hometown, except me and another friend of mine. we are still here, at the hostel. it is dark outside the hostel. only the street lights lighten up the sideline of the road. all the lights are off, but not for the fifth floor's of F5B. Here, the lights are still on, shining out into the darkness of the block.

we have the wheels, but we have the chain either. locked, and no place to travel. weird isn't it? And we are really bored. only day and night make the distinct differences, and the rest are retained unchanged. our gadgets are our best companions now, fully dependent on them. The rest, we never bordered. we have forgotten how many meals we had skipped, how many bottles of plain water filled up our empty stomach. it's no more to be our concern.

now, i'm listening to the grand orchestra from the sky. the thunder is performing it's best to entertain us. along, with the lightning, it is striking throughout the sky just like the fireworks. How tremendous they are, how beautiful it is.

arhh..., that's enough. these are reflecting how miserable am i.

Ok..i'm just finished my 1st CA 3 days ago. needless to ask how's my doing. i, myself also pretty not sure regarding my scoring. but, wasn't satisfied with my performance. arrh...let's skipped that part either. Just away from the floor of execution. that's good enough.

tomorrow will be the start of weekdays, so I'm really looking forward for the best to come.haha...cheow...

being assessed...

2008-03-28T15:58:00.010+08:00

hello there, it has been quite some time for me to leave this page in the condition of 'outdated'. what i mean is the content, not the layout of this page. don't get me wrong here. however, i'm still manage to grab some slot to change the blog header and add some new links and quotes in the side bar.-->

old header

new look

it seems that another week has passed. and this had effectively reminded me that i gonna be assessed in my coming Continuous Assessment 1 which fall on the 7th april 2008. Gosh! not again, the debts are still remain unpaid. how can this payment compensate back the time for more studies? unlike my other classmates, they are so...oh no, please not mention about them. don't feel like to. they are just freaking c_ _ z _ ( fill in the blanks with the following options: a, r & y) into their studies. consequently, this had reminded me how bad am i. But, just don't feel like be one them.

and, currently i'm busy with some university 'assignments', the blog of the university public speaking competition- AIMST VC's Public Speaking Challenge Cup: http://www.aimstvccup.blogspot.com/. anyone interested in joining it? shine your talent to us, aimsters? anyway, just ask for fun and i meant it too.

so, as i said another week has passed, a boring one. But, still can't be stoping me to take some shots around the university. here is the sharing moments of AIMST University...

see you!

while wandering...

2008-03-22T07:36:00.007+08:00

it is another weekend, a long one. but life is still riding on the old fashion track. study? sleeping? and, non other than wandering? i always keep wandering why my life style is so, i mean it is so ordinary and also accompanied by a little bit of dullness. what is it all about, study, sleeping and wandering? it is being a doubt or even doubts to me ever since my new chapter of life started 2 months ago. nevertheless, i have no refusal to keep up to it. although I'm always teasing my way of living, like what I'm doing now. anyway, it is always good to do so because at least you are cleared for what or how have you done.

in the midst of wandering and dreaming, i have taken back my long lost hobby, yes, photography and photo editing. as a way to a breakthrough i have taken pictures of 4 to colour up my life and make it more meaningful to me as time passes. and these are some of the sharing.

i think it all about for this time. maybe i will share more in the coming days. i hope so.Good day!

metabolically idiot

2008-03-09T14:31:00.010+08:00

ages by ages; time by time; day by day; moment by moment, i have come to a point where i had fallen into the great deep cavity and being metabolically processed to be an idiot.

i still remembered the 1st day of the lecture by Proff. Marya, he had quoted: "welcome into the great sea." by showing this picture to us:

as i said before i'm the idiot who had jumped into the sea. restless, uneasy feeling filled up the entire sphere, ruined up the ordinary sequence of life.

i cried for peace but it never being delivered, i shout for fun but it refuses to answer..........i'm being metabolically idiot. Like a feeling-less creature, never know, never cares whatever ups and downs which had surrounded me. all the senses has lost it's usage, and sensation of numb is the dominant feel of life.

the conquered wisdom, has limited me to seek for the knowing facts, the general occurrences,the precise answers and the ever true knowledge. i was dumbed.

i don't like to be like that, i want to run a way out; i want to regain my old fashion way of life. there is where the abundant of joy and rejoice over flow the ages and spring over my life. i have quoted this,

"life with books is, a bug's life.

life with joy is, the great happiness space"

my metabolic pathway of idiot-ship.

The End!

clarifying

2008-02-17T18:46:00.005+08:00

Are we living in the reality world? Or we aren't reality but abstract? Someone had said that we are living in the mysterious world. The world is full of myth, legend and mysterious scene and stories. Doubts and blurry circumstances have blind folded the truth, the significance meaning of living. Where is the truth? Or basically, what is the truly truth of all things and kinds? We, human beings are the truth seeker and also the truth spoiler. Some said, truth is painful, is dark. And the other will say, truth is the precious philosophy. It’s dependent! Whether it is dark or light of all things, it is only depending on the human's interpretation and realization.

Undeniable, we are the intelligence mammal but we are fooled by the worldly earth. The unknown truth, the mysterious myth, the unseen legend and the confuse circumstances, they are all being buried and covered by the earthly soil. The manmade truth is flourished abundantly in this so called lovely world.

We are tiring for all these while, it is too much and too heavy for us to travel with these confusing burdens. It is time, we have to let go! Let it be for what it will be. Clarifying is just the first step to face the inner part of souls. Face it or run away from it, it is again depending to YOU, your true selves.

Clarifying is the key of truth

right back here

2008-02-12T16:19:00.000+08:00

i'm back, right back here as in back here and here......oh no! i don't what i'm talking about. ok, let me clarify myself. firstly, i'm back here to the sphere after a long break for Heroes Season II and CNY. and, secondly, i'm here to the field of paddy to continue my journey of life. frankly speaking, the time is not at apt. my soul is still wandering in the midst of CNY atmosphere, only and the only body of mine just like the lifeless kind sweeping away the mood of the festive celebration. Body without soul, mind and strength is like a king with no throne, a lion with no teeth, and like birds without wings. How?? Please take me back from where i am, where i be for where i have joy!

on the 6th day of CNY, 12 February 2008 and the second day of class after the break, my day has been bombarded with 2.5 inches of 19 sets of Philosophy’s notes. MY goodness! questions that were never being asked like, what is what do you understand? the lecturer is enjoying getting us into the beauty of philosophy while i was sitting behind with a dozen of question's marks surrounding my head. She said ' welcome to the world of philosophy, where you can seek the beauty of knowledge. "for me "welcome to the blurry world". Really! those decades old ancient philosophers were killing me with their "beautiful words" and "tremendous quotes". Impressive right???

anyway, it is glad to be back here, of cause back to the sphere and too, to the paddy field. and, i will try hard to "communicate" with those philosopher, hopefully they will clear my doubts. By the way, i would like wishing you all

Happy Chinese New Year. Gong Xi, Gong Xi......

Bye!

off

2008-01-29T21:19:00.000+08:00

off for Hero season 2. Cya!

An eye for an eye!!

2008-01-22T22:00:00.000+08:00

An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth.

Do you ever think of that, to revenge? Let says, someone had boiled your blood due to certain circumstances, would you like take a step to forget or forgive them, or you choose to payback?

“Payback time!” certainly that’s the most using word when someone has hit their nerve.

Let’s don’t talk about how we take vengeance on someone. Rather, let us take a glimpse for why we want to payback for what a person had done to us. Honestly I can tell there are million of reasons why we want to pay back. Below are the roots of the fighting spirit. Come on, show your colors! ...yes, that’s it………

· Dignity
· Glory
· Feminine or vice versa

Throughout history, a risen and fallen kingdom or dynasty has its own telling story. Likewise, in our daily life we are working at the same pace, we rise and fall all the time. There are moments of pride and humility. Apart from the mistake (inner strength) we had done to cause the fall. There is still another equally strong drives to cause the fall of us, the ‘attack’ from the outer strength.

Have you ever been disappointed by someone? And, you have a great feeling had been let down, in addition to, you feel that someone deserve a payback from you.
There is a story……….

Long time ago, there were 2 good buddies, Peter and Paul. They were friends since they were at the age between 4 -5. When they had grown up, both of them became traders. They traveled around the world for trading purposes in order to earn a living. Unfortunately, things never went well all the time, Peter planned to marry a lady of France whom was the person who Paul fall into as well. When Paul got to know this, he felt so unpleasant with it. Thus, he decided to spoil their relationship by creating rumors to slur Peter’s repute. And, it works. The France lady had left Peter. Peter cried to Paul for her living and swore that he will kill the person who spoiled his life. But, in the end Peter was poisoned by Paul because Peter had known the truth for all these while and stopped Paul continue to trade in their trading route. Hence, Paul choose to sacrifice one’s life due to his future living and the most important thing was he had loosed his ever buddy when his deeds against Peter has been revealed.

Does Peter deserve that payback?

Does Paul deserve the treatment from Peter?

I don’t know. I personally think that Peter is so kind hearted to do so. If I was in Peter’s shoe, Paul will be vanished in my sight. However, in this modern day, ‘vanish’ is no more there, I will just assume that person is a transparent sheet of paper. I can’t see him.

Sometime things are difficult to be forgotten and forgiven. You can forgive but sometimes you cannot forget. This is simply because that incidence had left a mark deeply in your heart. Or, you cannot forget and you cannot forgive as well. But, if you had forgotten which means you had forgiven.

People take days and years or even their whole life to remember what had been done wrong to them by someone. In their pure mind, something needs to be done so that they will feel relief. This is the cycle of life they claimed. An eye for an eye is what they meant.

As in my personal life, I had 2 incidents that basically I had forgiven them but I still cannot forget that moment of their frosty look. Luckily I’m free from all that now.

As a guy, we can effort to loose anything but dignity. Once it has been challenged, anything can be happened. Friends can become rival, brothers can become enemy. That’s an observation! In fact, that might be true.

As a lady, they can loose anything but reputation. Their repute is equally as their lives. Once it has been spoiled or used in vain, I can assure you that they will remember you forever. You may try if you want to.

Sometimes it can be forgotten but still can’t be forgiven; it can be unforgotten and too, it can’t be forgiven. But when it has been forgiven, it is too being forgotten.

i'm on the way...coming!!!!!!

2008-01-16T22:57:00.000+08:00

“I’m on my way.”

This is the most common phrase being used when someone call us, yet we are still preparing our selves to get to the party, gathering, celebration and so on.

A: ‘hello, Kenny is it?’
B: ‘yes, speaking.’
A:’ where have you been? We are waiting for you; the party is going to start.’
B:’ ok. I’m on the way. Almost there.’
A: ‘ok see you. Bye!’
B: ‘bye!’

So guess where is Kenny???

He claimed that he is on his way to attend the party. But, he is actually answered the phone after showering. So, the point to ponder, what does ‘on the way’ mean in this situation? Is it a lie or an act to entertain his friend? Or maybe, is it just a common habit of people? Evaluate it yourselves…….

So, what and when is ‘on the way’? From time to time, we become ignorance towards the actual meaning of ‘on the way’. Spontaneously, we will answer them with that answer when somebody is asking the corresponding question. It is kind of natural respond. Undeniable that is the fact.

Sometimes that is the moment of truth. We can just simply tell them where we are and tell them if we will be late for the function. It is nothing to shy of, by the way it is kind of bravery to admit the difficulties we are facing rather than tell a lie or give an excuse to entertain our friends.

The difference between 5 minutes and 30 minutes is so obvious. So, take a step to have a change. You can make a difference.

Anyway, that Kenny referred above is actually the Kenny, also known as Roken, I. Myself. Wakaka…………...

These are the 15 common and effective excuses that I use when I can’t make it on time:
1. I’m on the way. Almost there.
2. I’m looking for parking space
3. I’m lost
4. I can’t find the place. Can you come to _ _ _? I will meet you here and you will take the lead.
5. I have something on, will be late
6. I think I will be late
7. Huh? Is 7.00p.m.? I thought is 7.30p.m…okk.. I’m coming now.
8. See you v~e~r~y~ soon
9. Mark my time. 2 minutes!
10. Hey, I saw the place already
11. Hey, I see you at the opposite side.( but actually you are few streets apart)
12. I’m waiting for the traffic light to turn green.
13. If can, take the blame on the others.(so far haven’t tried yet)
14. The most frequent trick of mine. Have some jokes with them, make them partially forgot the purpose to make that call.
15. Best of the best don’t answer the phone.( they will think that you are here)
However, every time when there is a gathering or any form of function, for sure there is somebody who comes later than me. So, that’s another sweet escape. haha………………

LATE WITH WISDOM!

someone gonna be hurt????

2008-01-12T22:18:00.000+08:00

haha..no hard feelings ya.............

The person I dislike most……………..
I believe that every homosapiens has at least a guy who they don’t like…….. who is the one you don’t like? Don’t mind to share, haha…..em……just describe, needless to name them……haha…………….
As a typical homosapiens I do have someone that I don’t like….be honest I’m an easy going person, but still, I feel annoyed when if I see someone that I don’t like. Or maybe I might be someone that someone doesn’t like too. I don’t deny that, it is a realistic world.
Through out survey, most Malaysians dislike a person who likes back biting. so am i.Hm…how do categorize this kind of fellow? This nasty fellow likes to carry out an unpleasant or unkind talk about somebody who is not around. Undeniable, sometimes we do talk something bad about somebody, but that’s a limit. We must get to know where the limit is laid. If we don’t, we are categorized as a person who back biting. These are some of the conversation that sounds like back biting………….

“hey, friend. Do you know that, that Mr.unknown always talk something bad about you. He complains about your friends, the way you talk, the way you laugh and so on. Haiz…….he is always like that. he also talks about Mr.A. he is a knd of!@@#!*&. Don’t you think so?……………”

“oii,Miss Unknown is a disgusting person I ever met. You know that, she thinks that she is the prettiest girl in the school. Gosh! She always come to me and says she can be the queen of the school. I feel like giving her a slap. She is so annoying, I really can’t stand her. So my advice is, stay away from her. Gosh, really sick of her. haizzz………………..”

“My goodness! I can’t believe that Mr.unknown can do this kind of thing. He tries to ask Miss A to go for a date. And, you know what. Miss A is going with him. How can this be? He is dull person. Like a trunk. Some more, he is a boring guy. I think Miss A has no sense of common sense of a girl should has. If no, why don’t she sense that Mr.unknown is a trunk. Maybe Miss A never been asked for a date before. haha……….but, but, I still can’t believe that, man………..can you?”

do these conversation sound familiar??take some flesh back haha...................

These kinds of conversation can be repeated for few times to a different person whenever this nasty guy meets up someone. Certainly, this is the person I don’t like. Basically, the topic of conversation they carry out is about somebody’s bad things, we barely can hear that they give out complement for someone. Or even worst, they can evolve to become a new species, two-headed snake. Wooul…..dangerous species. This kind of fellow is far more treacherous than the person who just back biting you. They can be very nice to you, but they can also be vise versa when you are not around. Beware of their mask! Look around, they might be your friends or the worst is, they are your close friend. Why???? I really can’t understand. I have cracked my brain and try to look for an elucidation for it, but I failed. Maybe I just can assume that they have no common topic which they can chew the fat with. So, in order to stay in the ring, they have to do so- BACK BITING.

do you have things to say?????

a new member

2008-01-12T21:50:00.000+08:00

what if German Shepherd mates with Labrador Retriever?

anyway, i have no idea........until i see this....

this is the new member of my house, Lindy MacLora...hahaha............

Lindy's Profile:

Name: Lindy MacLora

Nick name: Lindee/Deedee

Sex: Female

Age: 2 months and 11 days

Daddy's breed: German Shepherd

Mother's breed: Labrador Retriever

Favorite food: Chicken rice

Favorite snack: Ping Pong Cream Crackers

Favorite drink: Warm milk

Favorite activity: Make fun with Jojo (the elder dog of mine)

Favorite place: Inside the house

have you get prepared????

2008-01-07T21:40:00.000+08:00

hallo there, yes. have you get prepared? preparation to welcome the year of rat( according to the Chinese zodiac calender). well, in here at kuching, the atmosphere of CNY preparation is fantastic. every corner of shops is blasted with the new year song. the red giant lanterns are hung everywhere. and, decoration items for CNY had flooded the retailer.

surprisingly,there is still a month time to go before CNY, but the chinese in kuching are already in their mood of celebrating it. pick and choose;select and buy. yeah, they are in the midst of CNY celebration, so deeply.haha....

so, are you in the same boat with them? have you get prepared? if you had done so, i just can say 'well done'...haha............man, don't you think that's a little bit too fast for it? I'm. what do you think then?

looking forward

2008-01-02T22:40:00.000+08:00

what i have seen? i see a long track right in front of me. and also, i see some blur images. what do they mean to me?i have cracked my brain and try to figure the out the vision and i have concluded them into a word- learn. basically, i have to learn, learn and keep learning.sounds terrible but it is the truth. the chosen track of mine is the way that i should lead on. this is the track that prepare my heart to move and look forward. thus, and my duty is to sharpen the blur images and identify them.

since the track has become visible to me in 5 years ago,and i have come to a point that i need to commit my full self into it. supprisingly,i never know that i can reach to this point after my failure in the past. i have fallen and fell deep in pain. but, luckily i never ignore it. if i have given up at that time i will never be what I'm now. may be compare to those great men out side there, my failure is just like a dust in the air. but, it is my turning point, the point where i learned to stand up from where i fall.the transformation point of mine.

the image!

i try to focus. i focus on the long track. and try to see the things that I'm looking for. but i see dozens of books, every book has the thickness at least 10cm. My Goodness! am i dreaming? no, is realistic, is real. however, i have accepted the fact. i keep focusing( sorry Shaun, lend me your face.haha....................

focusing..................

i also see rocks. what does it symbolize? rock is hard. yes, it is hard, the track is hard. but, i will try to look for the space in between them and search for the way to flow. this is the challenge, and i need to prepare myself for it. can i make it?

hard rock

hope is always there. with hope, hard rocks will become spongy buds. so, i really hope that there will be 'hope' out there spring wildly.

the open sky of hope

now onwards, I'm looking forward. looking for the coming days and i will try my very best to strike for the goal and lead on the track.

looking forward!

this is my new year wish.haha.....all the best and Happy New Year-2008.

the history

2008-01-02T21:50:00.000+08:00

it has come to an end. a full stop to circle up the whole year of 2007...good bye 2007.

a new start

2008-01-01T21:25:00.000+08:00

hello there, it has been quite sometime for me, who was missing in the sphere......as now, i have return, back to the sphere. the return of mine has marked the end of year 2007, and the begin of year 2008.

a year has past,

bring away all the happenings,

and stored them all as history.

at the same time,

a new page is starting,

begin to draft the future.

haha....as for me, nonono....................wait for a moment. let it be for what it will be, but for the past, is what i kept.keeping all these memorable things into my memory.

the grand recall of 2007.

1. the countdown and welcoming 2007 at penang

2. the start of term 3

3.the end of foundation studies

4.the break, long break

5.the return to penang

6.the farewell

7.the visit from westerner of Malaysian to sarawak

8.the celebration of my birthday

9.the waiting of my results

10.the arrival of my results

11.the receiving of my offer letter

12.the return to my university

13.the shifting of my church

14.the celebration of Christmas day

15.the silent return of mine

16.end......................

it was a wonderful year for me.a year with dozens of occurrences.i really, really be thankful for what i had overcome in the year of 2007. if there was a chance i would like to write a summary for 2007. but, i bet that, it will be a long page of that summary. may be i will continue it in the older post of 'what is Kenny never exist in past 5 years'.only if i have the time.

this time, i have return to kuching, my lovely hometown in a secretive way. a plan to give my parents a surprise. and it was a successful plan.haha....i have given my mom a mini heart attack when she saw me stand right in front of her.but, i have received a warning from her, stated 'no more surprise in the future'.sad case......haha...................anyway, the return of mine this time seems to be a myth, no one knows i'm back here in kuching, HELLO!i'm back.

Christmas Night

2007-12-22T01:28:00.000+08:00

hey there, yes! it is over, really over, the examination is finally OVER.... and the holiday is officially ON, yippee!haha.....i gonna chill to the maximum for these holiday, don't care! em..before i go off, i would like to share a little bit of the Christmas night we had in my university...again, it is organized by the Levites and Friends of AIMST. i hope you still remember the Levites, it is in the older post of mine.as usual I'm the cameraman of the night, dozen of photos i have taken and these are some of them..please enjoy!

the crowds of the floor...........

sing it! Joy to The World..............

the singers!

the choir

the dancing queens

hey!wait.let us take some snaps......

kenneth and i

wow!come on 1,2,3.4........go, spin it!spin it!............

the peak....Feliz Navidad.........

the VC

my batchmates, friends and me, myself

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

And last but not least, I wish you all, Merry Christmas And Happy New Year!

the church members and the cameraman

it gonna over

2007-12-18T20:50:00.000+08:00

the time has come for the examination to drop a full stop. it gonna over sooooooooooooooooooon! haha.........................after days and nights of battle and struggle, finally it is being rounded up with smiles and hugs of relaxation. the examination hall is like the dark dungeon, the invigilators are like the full armed guards, guarding the dungeons, their eyes are just like the hunting black hawk, shine ad sharp, staring at us all the time. and, by tomorrow around the same time as now, we will be set free. the freedom has come back to us. my long lost companion, i'm glad for your return. oh...the tears of happiness had flowed. oh mind, what is this? what am i doing? what am i saying? anyway, i'm really glad for the examination to end,really! who doesn't, right? up right next is non other than Christmas Day. Ho Ho Ho............Merry Christmas!haha...........my Christmas in my university.

that's all? where are the people? haha.............up next!erm.........coming soon............choew for study.cya!

schadenfreude

2007-12-11T16:11:00.000+08:00

oh schadenfreude....

you make me like an annoying evil chap.

my laughter brings in a violence troop of army,

marching towards the fighting field.

battle horns and trumpets blast all the way long,

breaking the silence of peace.

oh no, schadenfreude....

you have turned me to a hatred beast.

my voice is just like a swarm of killer bees,

flying around in the clean air,

waiting for the poor to approach,

and seize their lives by the deadly sting.

schadenfreude....

you have make me evolved to a cold blood man,

my thoughts mirrored the killing disaster.

like the giant wave strike on the coast,

and show no mercy.

like eruption of the angry volcano,

and sweep around with the flaming lava.

you, schadenfreude....

away from me, i shall bow to you no more.

i will rebuild my own nation with great mercy.

and one day,you shall bow to love and care.

your throne will be tore and slit apart,

for the peace and love will overthrone yours,

schadenfreude.

and i will see you no more!

study week

2007-12-09T13:27:00.000+08:00

examination countdown- 9 days to go.

Christmas day countdown-16 days to go

new year countdown-22 days to go

course restart-42 days to go

Chinese new year -59 days to go

1st continuous assessment- 110 days to go.

haha.................these are the major events coming up.

when somehow you feel that there is tension around due to examination stress, study stress, or any form of stress, please stop and give your self a break. Go and have fun.haha.......my motto for this study week. but,must remember where is your desk, and come back for study. drive your way. or ,the classic way to advice, ' the future is in your hand'.

PIKOM PC Fair is here at Sungai Petani. held in CS( centre square), our 'Gurney Plaza'.....haha.

i went there yesterday, but is kind of disappointment to me and my friends in the sense of price, varieties of hardware, small size fair and so on. but still attract lots of local folks...

That's it. and the handsome Sikh in the pic is my batchmate.haha......he too being attracted to it.haha.....

next, we went for the movie 'The Golden Compass'. no comment from me about the show. just watch it for leisure.

Final touch. to the 'wai sek kai' of sungai petani for dinner and we found this.

'Char keuh tiaw'- this aunty em....specifically grandma......haha.....has 40 years of experience of frying 'kueh tiaw' -------secret recipe is what she had. one of the interesting point is she is still using coal as fuel.the one and the only one is SP.

a wooden box full of coal.

that's the first day we spent for this study week........up next.......STUDY lah.................

end............

Survival

2007-12-07T02:09:00.000+08:00

hey! now is 2.am. rainy day. it is cold and humid out side there. supposing i should lay on my bed and rest my day in this superb weather. but, my roommates and i still staying awake and doing our own things. face to face with our laptop. shaun is scrolling on people' blog, ke wei is looking for songs and download them, zai yi is hunting for Internet game and as for me, non but blogging and listening to the old Christmas song. ' i dreaming on the white Christmas....................'

yeah, Christmas season is here, my mind is blasted with all kinds of Christmas songs. can't wait for the day to come, 'hohoho.........Merry Christmas.'

as the silence night has not at its rest, and the quietness of its has been broken by the noisy amphibians. then, i flesh back for some moment. a year plus,i have been in this University located in a small town of Sungai petani,kedah, and planted in a rural area of Semeling Town. small but huge to explore, it is beyond my expectation that there is actually a medical university in it. however, small town less life style. at here, the shops start to close at 8pm and by 10pm, Semeling Town is at its entire rest of day. only left 1 or 2 shops are on its running. Out of my surprise too, i have seen great Indians' population here, lots of them. Puri, chapati, canai, tossei, various types of curry, are basically our daily meal. what can you expect from them? i asked my self over thousand times. and still not satisfied with my own self comfort. 'please adapt to it, over 5 years you will able to love the delicious and unique taste of them'. surviving!

It is all about the surviving skill.as life goes on here, a firm foundation must be laid.

The things that you will come across here.

Great population of Indians-'mini india'
Various 'species' of Indians, Punjabi, Tamil, Telegus, Malayalees and Sikhs

Language- Tamil, Punjabi...........(try to understand)

Different slang and accent of the lecturers. sometimes, you will find it funny but pay attention don't mess around with them.

Typical Malaysian working style-top 'efficiency' in management.

Lots of talking session. basically you must talk.

Laugh as mush as you can-although sometime is lame

Food- daily menu: curry, curry and curry....vegetable in curry, curry soup, curry chicken, curry fish, curry...........................

Entertainment: Indian songs blast every corner-'auto alarm clock'

Religious place- Hindu deities.......Rama, Krishna,Ganesha..............

those are the ten basic things you will take into account when you step in to this university. frankly speaking, i never mix or even know about Indians till i come here. In Sarawak,Indian has a minimal population. that's why i was shock to see lots of Indians when i first step into this university. but overall i still manage to know their style and culture.

as i said, small town less life style. so, in order to keep my teenage life with full of excitement and interesting especially during these study years. i have come out with an ultimate surviving plan in order to stay lively in here.

Adapt yourself to the shpere

do not isolate yourself

go and make friends-lots of friends-better still if you can get friends around Malaysia

know your holidays well

plan your holidays well-go and explore around

finished your work loads before you go off
flexible to your schedule

listen and try to accept your friends' opinion

sharing is caring

mind your surroundings

concentration during lectures

know your class's veteran and patron or dominant

run your own budget planning

encourage each of your friends to study

have some games for leisure

organise some interesting activities-during festival season

consult to your friends if you undergo stress-any form of stress

'joker and joke'-my favorite

listen to your friends and understand them

'Get Some Life'

haha...that's my commission for the surviving plan. during the coming years, i will try my very best to keep our lives as interesting as possible. 5 years of studies, it gonna be long and draggy. therefore, we learn, we dream and we play. That's life

Accomplishments.........

my days in my study year 2006/2007

love talk:the science of love

2007-12-04T11:54:00.000+08:00

sparks fly, surrounded by the sweet romance, yes!, I'm in love. Do you ever think that falling in love is come from a chemical-drip,drip- reaction in your body? can you control the feeling of love?

white chocolate, colorful roses, lovely piggy or 'bear-bear' soft toys, candle-light dinner, Valentine day.....the perfect complementary sets to express your unshaven love to your love ones. thus, the point to ponder is, why it is so? what is the cause to trigger a person to execute those planning? it is the, nature, tradition, wisdom or the chemical reaction inside the person's body?

love is essential, it is then known as the intentionally respond to promote well-being. over centuries, love had been widely used as the theme of art works, poems, songs, plays, literature, global operations, politic statements, and even the studies of science,

in the past century, love had been greatly explored in the science researches and studies. in biological findings, love (as sex) is viewed as a mammalian drive, like hunger and thirst. on the other hand, in psychology, love sees more as social and cultural phenomenon. further on, all these research papers had been led into neuroscience studies which summed up love, as a chemical reaction occurred in the system of the human body. there are probably elements in both views- the chemical of body, hormones and pheromones, certainly had influenced a person's feeling of love. researches and MRI scan had shown the result of the human brain when it is in love. therefore, the science database of love is debatable against the nature proclamation of love.

in 1992, a book- The Anatomy of Love- had drawn out the three main phases of love. 1st- lust.2nd-attraction and 3rd- attachment. inside it's finding,it had stated that when person is about to fall in love, he or she must undergo the stage of lust which is the basic sexual instinct. then, the person will upgrade to another phase, the attraction phase where the plannings and doings to express love took place. After that, he or she will move on to the third phase, the attachment.here, the couple of love ones will change the form of romantic love into liking, or from consummate to companionate. in these stages, different types of hormone involved in order to change the sparks of love to passionate love.

in 2006, an article in National Geographic- Love: The Chemical Reaction,- had discussed the love and the responsible of chemicals. In it's discussion, love is drove by two major drives - the sexual desire and the attachment. and, sets of chemical had took place to generate love.

Love = Cocktail of Hormones

from the equition above, hormones are the basic algebra. Hormone is the chemical messenger which giving out signal from one cell to another through blood stream. and the route for this traveler is the endocrine system. the master coordinator of the hormonal activity in mammals is the hypothalamus acting on input it receive from the central nervous system.

The Central Nervous System of Human

Due to the brain is the master coordinator, every single signal sent must come through it. Brain control your feeling, love for instance. when a person is falling in love, the brain will send sets of signal to cause a certain stimulation of hormones and this causes various types of effects, for example, when you see your love one, your heart will beat faster without your consent.

Now let us see, what types of hormone will cause us fall and stay in love.

Testosteron and Estrogen-sex drive hormones
Adrenaline -The initial stages of falling for someone activates your stress response, increasing your blood levels of adrenalin and cortisol. This has the charming effect that when you unexpectedly bump into your new love, you start to sweat, your heart races and your mouth goes dry.
Dopamine-This chemical stimulates ‘desire and reward’ by triggering an intense rush of pleasure. It has the same effect on the brain as taking cocaine!
Serotonin-One of love's most important chemicals that may explain why when you’re falling in love, your new lover keeps popping into your thoughts
Oxytocin- is a powerful hormone released by men and women during orgasm.
It probably deepens the feelings of attachment and makes couples feel much closer to one another after they have had sex. The theory goes that the more sex a couple has, the deeper their bond becomes.
Vasopressin-another important hormone in the long-term commitment stage and is released after sex.

Overview-

The concept of love, however, is a rather debatable one. Some deny the existence of love, stating that it is a recently invented abstraction. Humans, being what they are, can't help themselves; they will make the same errors in judgment repeatedly, and continue to fall in "love". Love remains as a mystical theory: the science of love. Thus, whether a relationship will last or not can be determined by science.

Summary:
Hormones>>>>>Love>>>>>Sex>>>>>Reproduction

i am back.

2007-12-03T20:36:00.001+08:00

i am back here in the blogshpere,haha..............

finally i have liberated from the work loads..........lots of them........good bye WORKS!

however, this week gonna be my last week of lecture, and in two weeks time, Mr. Exam is coming. so, i need to go back to the old school fashion, study!

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

days...........

passing like the moving train,

speedy yet draggy.

happy hours never seems long and stay.

always ended fast and quick.

the day has come to meet its throne,

and the suffer is always on the poor weak servants.

oh, days..........

rushing like the water fall.

please pause and wait.

take your time to come to us,

never hasten and hustle for departure.

let your servants be well in prepared,

and, one day

let the blasting horns symbolize the grand welcoming of thou.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

haha..dont know why i come out with that, so called poem also. it just played out from my mind so i just get it recorded.

once a while!no harm!.......my hostle life....

when you get bored...........this is what you can do..........'name design'

be right back

2007-11-27T10:07:00.000+08:00

the day after 3 weeks, i will be placed in the grand examination hall and be examined. 3 months of studies, dozens moment of pleasure. haha...nah just kidding!
but partially is true. when examination is approaching, the complementary set of assignment, projects, work log and assessment will be served along too. who the ___ on earth run the show in this way? now, my mind,my soul and my strength are flooded by those work loads. thousand of words for each assignment.if can, copy and paste is the most brilliant idea. but, it couldn't work in such a way, too bad, right? haha... so, i will be leaving my blog for a few days or even a week and will be right back as long as i finished my workssssssssssssssss.
while works are randomly accomplishing............

Tarantula?~~~~~ no, just a common species of spider that you can find anywhere.

oh, come ye, faithful servants.

Bye!.............................................................

a welcome speech

2007-11-22T11:12:00.000+08:00

before i finished up the study in love talk, i would like to address to you all the new blog of us , a photo blog named Life Through Images. it is officially launched at 14 November 2007. the blog is basically blog on stories of us or anyone which is reflected from the photos we captured. for more understanding please log on to http://www.life-through-images.blogspot.com/ . in here,you are able to visualize the conversation between life and pictures. How does it work? please join us, and we will bring you to experience the other part of world.

love talk

2007-11-20T18:51:00.000+08:00

4 hours, 1 project.........amazing huh! but, not impressive.

yet, somehow we kind of used to the way we do things. s-l-o-w~~~~ and steady. really slow but effective. we have been given this project 5 weeks ago, perhaps. however, we just get started the work today and finished it off in 4 hours and ended at 3 p.m. sharp. a huge risk to take. so, boys and girls please don't follow our path.if you insisted to mimic the steps of us, you may try.

the given topic, sexuality and family. what is that? no clues, no idea and leave us alone,hanging in the middle of no way. how do we suppose to get it started? well, i just get to know the whole picture of this topic in that 4 hours.

sexuality huh? sexual acts, behaviour, practice, style and bla.bla.bla.....fit it with whatever you can think of. love and sex is the fundamental key which we should take into account. can you see the connection in inner part of them? pretty interesting isn't it?

everything starts from the beautiful word called 'love'. love seems very powerful and mighty. that's a song named 'love changes everything'. it sings ."love, love changes everything......" so, how does actually love interfere the humans kingdom? how does love change the world? what is the microscopic bonding between love and sex? series of question can be generated from it.

love defines as a strong feeling to somebody that you are sexually attracted to. from it's very definition, we can see that love is directly link with sex. love is a form of feelings and here come it's best friend 'lust', a type of desire, which can turn romance to strong sexual desire. and desire is the bridge to proceed to the world of sex. can you guys see the link?

love is pure, the pureness of love delivers the true romance. on the other hand, lust is the other way round, it delivers the urge of having sex or more. when this is directed to the field of discussion, the sexuality philosophy will be approached. sexuality philosophy looks into 2 particular ways, conceptually and normatively.

Conceptual analysis is carried out in the philosophy of sexuality in order to clarify the fundamental notions of sexual desire and sexual activity. On the other hand, normative philosophy of sexuality inquires about the value of sexual activity and sexual pleasure and of the various forms they take.

from this point of view,the definition and the philosophy of sexuality it selves, had already shown a series of connection from the human’s sex behavior to the desire or the style of sexuality of a human being.

Love->Lust->Desire (thoughts and value)->Sex

so, the question has bounced back to us once again, what is the mean of love? and also, can sex practically express love? how does the feeling of love being stimulated in the body of human beings? can love be subjected to science explanation or the nature proclamation?

.........................................................to be continued..............

the taste not taken

2007-11-19T11:03:00.000+08:00

this is another dedication post, particularly for the beautiful soul- kennethwongpk.blogspot.com.

yes the taste not taken.....................

here it flows..................

taste,
countless taste the soul had tried,
yet the pleasing taste has not come to him,
playing hide and seek with all alone.
waiting seems like the best way through,
but, the feeling of heart is still empty and hollow.

sorry, for the slow passing waiting path.
somehow it might slice your heart apart,
but the precious taste is yet to come.
waiting is still the wisest move,
try to fill up the hollowness of room
with the trumpet of joy and bliss.

bitterness seems mirroring the most reluctant one,
carving telling full of painfulness.
the taste broke the glassy heart of man,
yet the man seeks the pupose of growth inside of it.
every passing like millions light years away,
and the taste will be bitter less then free.

sour took place in space of heart,
when cocktail of acids showering on the unshielded heart.
Reflection of sadness being seen crystal clear,
yet shading away by the free flow tears.
comfort and soothe are the healing pills,
cleansing the sourness in the sense of taste.

fiery taste boiled the pot of excitement,
hot and spicy dries away the well of deception
Fun and joy flooded the room of emptiness,
shinning teeth shine brightly in the mist of joyful scenes.
the taste too, lead you across the deadly boundary
and set you in the flame of agony.

for the taste not taken,
seems sweet and pleasing well.
sweetness meld the frozen heart of souls.
can't wiat for the time to taste, the taste not taken.
sweet, everlasting sweetness, come ye,
for the soul is waiting for thee.

be hail, the taste not taken
the journey is still long and far,
endless point can't be seen on path,
and the taken path is the way he leads,
hallow the soul for what he did,
until he had arrived to taste, the taste not taken.

i have full filled my promise to you, my friend, i hope you will understand what does it mean. for 19 months i have known you as my friend, and uncountable things that i have seen you went through with. so, i think i have the need to summarize them up and dedicate it to you, as i wrote the taste not taken to you. enjoy reading it and let me know if you had tasted the precious taste of all, sweet.

a dedication post

2007-11-15T23:41:00.000+08:00

hello, creatures, human beings and the most beloved friends of mine...

in this precious time, i would like to grab this wonderful opportunity just to deliver my wishing to you all, who are having their examination in SPM, STPM, term-examination, final examination or whatever form of examinations you can have, Good Luck and All The Best in your strike.

everything is just like the passing shadows,

fleshing through every angle and dimension.

once,it was in the hurry and rush,

but now it has no turning back.

the sound of the ticking clock seems approaching,

ticking with a harmony pace.

for the time is here in present,

avoid never seems exits then.

do the best for what you can,

and the wishing trumpet will blast till victory made.

so, my friends go ahead to show your power and strength. go and tell the examiners 'here i am, give me the papers for i have ready for them'..haha..all the best and luck, friends................加油！

path of life

2007-11-14T15:06:00.000+08:00

a sense, a feel

makes things look whatever they are.

a thought, a notion

gives the precious turning point.

a look, a glance

capture the finest of the awaken.

a smile, a laugh

grabs back the memorable moments.

a fight, a cry

teaches the need of unity.

a thank, a hug

shows the truthful appreciation.

a guilt, a fault

causes a man to grow.

a line, a stroke

seems marking the view-less separation.

a why, a how

is the remaining doubts to solve.

a wish, a greet

simbolizes the ever sopportting rock.

a stop, a dot

is where i make

'the end'.

KL via Penang

2007-11-10T11:06:00.000+08:00

hello there, the self-declared deepavali break will be ended in 2 days time.so, before get myself back to the study-sphere, i would like to take a little moment to share my travel during this break.yup, KL via Penang. yeah, in the last post, i was in Butterworth, Penang, and wondering about my existence in past 5 years. and now, i am back to my campus. sitting on this semi-cushioned office chair and drafting this post. time flies and this reminded me, our final exam is just 1 month ahead.wow...but not shocking at all.haha....okk..back to the trip,KL via Penang.

it was a sudden plan, we don't really think either plan about it at all.so, preparation wise, em....not so..but, it is another fantastic trip and it has been recorded in Moment.

date:4th November 2007.

time:0900.

departure:AIMST University.

arrival:Butterworth

destination: Penang Island/Seberang Prai.....

yup, Penang again, now i need to reconsidering Penang as my 2nd home.how about that...ahaha..
this time, not going anywhere just stick around at Bayan Lepas area and Queen's Bay Mall.hanging around, watch movie, meeting friends and em......forgotten what i have done there.

so, let me introduce to all of you another happening place of Penang.happening as in food not the place where everyone seems to be shaking, dancing,jumping,spinning and whatever they can do. if you want to know, let me tell you secretly....the places are at penang upper road. haha.....so, the happening place, Steamboat Buffet

a good place for tea time, ' old town cafe'

the kl trip
the 3rd home of mine.haha....once again i have come back to this fast motion city,KL.em..nothing much we have done there, as usual hanging around and seeking for something special.
new mall, Pavilion KL.here what we got there..the J-CO Donuts and Coffee, this is the1st branch in Malaysia based in 1 floor of Pavilion KL, originate from Indonesia.

ok...we have done here..proceed to another interesting place Coliseum Cafe and Hotel.
it is a steak house aged 86 year-old. started at 1921 till now.wow...known as the oldest steak house in Malaysia.this classic restaurant located at Jalan Tunku Abdul Rahman.

happy moments usually pass fast....that's all from me for this time .maybe next time i will bring more about special places and food in my coming post...cya...

at pudu raya bus station..the snap which mark the end of the trip..see you KL......

what if kenny didnt exits in past 5 years????

2007-11-04T23:56:00.000+08:00

currently i am in butterworth, penang while dropping this post. 1st time for me to draw a post in other places out of my hostel.

strange huh?? don't you think so, why this post, about the existence of mine in past 5 years? i feel it is strange,seriously. but, 1 thing i can assure that is i m not under depression which actually can caused me to be doubtful in my own existence. do you ever think of that? if you had never think of it, why don't you think about it,your existence?

thank to shaun, he leads me to think about it.fine, i have to think about it. and, it is quite true and fun to think about it.to think what is the consequences will it had if i never exits in past five years, especially to the surroundings of mine.

and i would like to view back 3 years ago, when i was in form 4.

if kenny wasn't there..................

perhaps my physics teacher is still teaching physics for upper secondary 4 and 5, not mathematics in transition classes and lower secondary 1.
perhaps my class will be a little bit quiet and my friends can be more concentrate during teaching.
perhaps the history class is like a history class
even perhaps the title of 'the four intelligence' is never appeared

2 years ago, when i was in form 5

if kenny wasn't there.................

perhaps my biology teacher is still teaching biology for upper secondary 4 and 5, even teaching form 6, not science for lower secondary 1 and 2.
perhaps the class will never had a second marker for additional maths and history papers
perhaps the class had less laughter
perhaps there will be no 'tai di' during recess
perhaps there will be no study group
perhaps there will be no 'satellite' for rumours
perhaps the title of ' the five intelligence', '4 sisters', '5 beauties',' the bananas' and etc are never there

wow...i feel guilty now....and i don't think i can continue it anymore. it makes me feel bad and makes me like a jerk.that's a lot of things i have done so far, directly or indirectly someone will be get hurt from me.seriously, i don't mean to hurt anyone of you, although sometimes i did. if i did hurt you before by any means of action.sorry to you all. but somehow rather this cant stop me, simply because i am who i am.haha....

by the way, for all the deeds above, for someone had joined the venture with me before. thank you and sorry. thank you for making these years lively. sorry for making you look bad from others.haha....

for past a year and this year..............anyone request for me to list down what i have done to you all?do respone.........

while alone.......

2007-11-01T21:33:00.000+08:00

deepavali is near, just a week ahead from now. and my university had declared a week holiday for that festive celebration. how great it is? happy faces can be seen every corner of my university. students are going back to their dearest home town. lecturers are returning to their lovely mother land. as for me,just sitting down on this semi cushion office chair and facing the outdated laptop of mine, recording all these deepavali celebration scenes into my blog. great right?hm..........no idea.............

it is a starless, quiet,calm and peaceful night. the unstoppable noises used to be in my room, seem to be vanished in the thin air. the laughter of mine and the fellow friends no more can be heard tonight. all of them have gone............the only thing that can be heard this night is just the chripling of the crickets. sharp yet synchronise nosies of them had broken the silence of tonight...................

nothing much can be done, just staring at the dark sky from my window and feel the gentleness of the wind, blowing upon my face....how calm and pleasant it is?

by the way, i will off to somewhere else for my deepavali break. i just feel free to drop by and leave a few lines here before i went off...haha.......

To all my Indian friends who are going to celebrate Deepavali, i wish you all Happy Deevapali and Happy Holiday........enjoy your selves! cya......

politics

2007-10-29T18:13:00.000+08:00

it was a fully packed day. continuous classes with no break at all.speechless!! what can i said? as usual, what a day!.............pointless for me to express the miserable of the days, Monday and Wednesday particularly.simply because these days have to come in the coming days, so pointless!

by the way, it is all about the surviving skill you had.especially in my university.in order to survive here, be strong is the 1st requirement. not talking about studies but the adaptation to the atmosphere here. But not this time, maybe i will post something about the surviving skill of mine in my university.

in this post i rather share with you a little matter that occurred this morning in my class. as you can see at the title, 'politics'. yes, the politics matter in my class. the politics referred is nothing to do with the national or international level but a class's politic.frankly speaking, politics stuff are not my cup of tea. and i dislike it the most. but it just happened today.

let me tell you briefly about the background of my class. a class of 63 students, formed by two huge races, the Indian 70% and the Chinese 30%. yup, all are medical students,13th batch MBBS student. all of them had a same dream, to be a doctor.i think that's all about them.unfortunately, the unity of us still cannot be seen after 2 months of interaction. Among 63 students, more than 10 gangs can be found in 1 class. we have been sub divided by the differences of interest, chatting topics, gender,culture,religion,backgrounds and last but not least, the races. sad to say that, but it is the fact of the truth.

so, i put all these as a politic business. the class as a nation. the class rap and those who are lending him their hands are the cabinet members. and, the gangs are the supportive party or can be the opposition party. so, it is a politic issue we are talking about.let us see how does the 'government' ruled the 'nation.'...........

today, the 'Parliament meeting' is held, as usual the the cabinet members of the government rose lots of matter which we had faced for past 2 months and figure out the problem and try to encounter them. so ,

1st issue

by the 'finance minister', "the 'nation' is in 'economy crisis', and action needs to be taken immediately."
strongly oppose by the 'opposition party' but failed to create an issue for the 'government'
solution: 'high taxes' paid by the 'people'

2nd issue

by the 'ambassador', "bad 'diplomatic relationship' with other 'nation', restore the image of our 'nation' in them"
zero feedback

3rd issue

by the 'prime minister',"'political parties' are suffered under internal struggle and 'people' of nation had bad attitudes and needed to be corrected."
opposed strongly by the 'opposition' and the 'supportive parties' and agreement still cannot be made after 'meeting'
issue will be carried on in the next 'meeting'
'opposition party member' warned the 'prime minister '"think twice before you speak, mind your language"

other issues

'working hours' prolonged
politeness need to be practiced often
etc.

see, only for two months, dozen of problems occurred. so, surviving skill is very significant. as Dr. Rajesh, my microbiology lecturer, said, "all things caused effect,and the effect caused side effect. if they didn't, they will be nothing." personally, i think it has the point there. so, i just hope that this 'politic' matter can be solved by next year. and this 'nation' will stay in peace for next 5 years.so, my massage is, 13th batch, let us grow. together we grow under 1 roof, we grow in 1 sound and view, we grow to reach our goal. and, together we grow as ONE.tq.

lost and found

2007-10-25T13:30:00.001+08:00

it was a hectic day, crossing two states in a couple of hours.why? what? how come?.....please don't ask me that again. by the way, things are so unpredictable. you will never know what is up next. yup, it just happened to me recently. yet, still being doubtful of it, is it a dream or a truth?wondering...........

lost and found....a simple phrase, but it has significance meaning in it self. a person will never learn to appreciate something till he lost it.haha.....what i mean is in general or maybe everything.do you agree? think! do you ever lost anything that makes you so wish to gain it back? if you did, congratulation! at least you still have the sense with you. undeniable we, human beings had lost uncountable things as time passing. sometime we gain it back, sometimes we don't and just let it be as it was.

a very good example of lost and found is happiness.
yes! H-A-P-P-I-N-E-S-S. every single human beings love happiness. i can bet with it. for who in this world love sorrow or suffering? the answer is just simply NO. No one on earth wants to suffer instead of full filling their lives with joy and happiness. do you ever heard people are complaining their life because they live happily? or, do you ever heard the refugees said that they were enjoying during the exile?

allow me to bring you the 'things' that the refugees had lost during their exile-happiness

they understand the definition of suffer more than we do. their crying are far more than the laughter of us. tears of fear, pain, sorrow and suffer of the people in Sudan is just like the free flow river . they are living in darkness and struggling for light. hence, they had simply lost the meaning of happiness in their lives. for 21 years, the nation of Sudan had never come in peace. non stop civil wars had caused the people to undergo exile, they are homeless, the refugees. besides that, the Sudanese were left in dying days, starvation, torturing and etc.what is in their mind is just present,nothing more than that, nor past neither future. their fate is unknown. they won't know what, where, how they will be after today. they just left the nation with heavy hearts and moving forward to the nearby refugee camp of UN. all they can do is keep moving, moving and moving, no turning back....they are the LOST BOY.since then, they had lost entirely the meaning of happiness.......................... how far they should go? nop, answer is not provided. the command given is keep following or being left behind or killed. therefore, the refugees of Sudan had no choice but keep moving in order for them to see tomorrow's sun.

see! the smile on their faces.are they the smile of glory? yes, maybe for them. but, it also reflected how many innocent souls they had taken.bloody smiles.......

the SPLA fighters of Sudan. job for them is aim and shoot. target:the enemies, rebellion or even their own people.

the scene in the refugee camp of Kakuma, Kenya.

crying for food..........

can i take it????pls..............

how far have they gone through? how many lives had lost in this tragic? how many blood had flown in this piece of land?.....yet, these people are still hoping for the peace to return to their nation. this is simply their hope and dream........so, the point to ponder. will their dream become their goal?

lend them a hand and things can be changed, the ending will be different from what you have seen in Sudan. so, take the 1st step to make a difference. yes, see the smiling face of these Lost Boy. once they were lost, and now they are found, along with their long lost friend, the happiness.
however, many still are suffering out there in Sudan and the refugee camps....they are still lost in the mist of terror...........will all these tragic come to an end one day? if yes,when will it be?......................unknown...........

Related movies:

pictures taken from: www.magnumphotos.com

and i m still loving it.....

2007-10-22T18:55:00.001+08:00

hey there to everyone.....was off for couple of days, being somewhere with my friends of 5. as usual, lousy day with lousy LAN courses....why everyday my life will be ruined by those 'lovely' subjects....put that a side man! give me a breath...a fresh one....however, luckily still, that's something colour my daily life, yup, non other than the clinical classes.the microbiology lecturer of mine, DR. Rajesh,a superb funny guy with great sense of humour. the lesson for today is simply on stupid human beings. he said all human beings are 'idiots' and these idiots generously welcoming the bacteria to grow in them and caused infection and diseases. i don't know how true it is.but logically, he is right. and he quoted "no microorganism wants to cause diseases".What do you think then????

okk...where did i stop in the past post?...oh ya, the Gurney Drive, the most happening place you can find in Penang island.let me present to you the tale of Gurney Drive.

the colourful lightings shine upon the great giant buildings of Penang Drive and make it as a non sleeping street.

the 'Anjung Gurney' hawker stall.

what can you find at here??..

does he look familiar to you? yup, he was once appeared in the Star paper, the heavenly food of Penang, 'Penang Cha Kueh Tiaw'. in action.bravo!

yes.that's the famous penang cha kueh tiaw.****kenny's choice.must have a try.another spot...the 'lok lok'. taste all you can...more than 20 varieties to choose....my advice is taste it 1 by 1.haha......

still got lots more but sorry, i wouldn't reveal them. this simply because this place is a good hunting area. you should visit and hunt it your self to feel the excitement and the satisfaction of it.no regrets. yes, this is non other than the Gurney Plaza, the shopping paradise. it based strongly in the middle of Gurney Drive, function as the heart of this drive. Facing towards the sea and declare the mighty and glory of it's.****hot spot of Penang.

i think that's all for Gurney Drive. Now let us straight proceed to Batu Feringgi via Tanjung Bunga.........

here we are at the Batu Feringgi beach.....

what can we see for our future???thats's the track we can follow but we cant see the end. Friends Happy Reunion and All the Best!still remember these two guys?yup, the two batards. What are they doing?? em...not really sure whether it is a trend or what....everyone seems like to jump and take a shot.any ideas? and we called this the ' beach jump'.and voted by them as the photo of the day..want to know who is the one who take this shot?? yup..that's my shot....

dinner time!F-O-O-D again. let's see what we got here..........

the ship, the best steak in town.

for western food lovers. you just cant missed the chance to have a drop at the ship. ****kenny's choice..yum yum.......... yes...we had come to the climax of the day.enjoy the atmoshpere.....relax........

to the next stop....back to Gurney Drive- Coffee Bean

in the Gents.haha......

that's the end of our day in this island. and the last stop of us, Bukit Mertajam, Seberang Prai. and we had our supper there at 2a.m., as we on the way back.the end.
For all these will be recorded in the mind of every single one of us. and, this precious moments is now recorded in the Moment.bye...........

by:

how can i stop loving it??

2007-10-17T00:35:00.000+08:00

ok..just get myself back to my university and try hard tuning my mind back to the right channel...Study-FM.

it will be another boring week for me again...Don't feel like further elaborate on it...really sick of it man.....yet my mind still floating at Penang

yeah, Penang Trip...i think that's the channel i would like to tune it on. it was a tremendous trip ever. em....the word which can describe my feeling is 'satisfaction'...the fulfillment of the goal of the trip.
still remembered the moody night i had, just before we get down to penang. and, this is what i quoted that night," it is a cold and lifeless night, nothing much can be done. Nothing, but sitting near the window and stare at the silence of the university.....gone! wow...luckily, i didn't let it to ruin my mood on the next day.
so. shall we start the journey to explore Penang?....em... i will take it as a YES for the question.

Let's go.........

it was a busy morning. the raya atmosphere had fully filled up this place. 'balik kampung' is the theme of the day.emmm.......for the Muslims only...as for us it was the 1st check-point to get we out from SP to Penang.keep waiting.............

the arrival at Butterworth bus station....can you see the 2 bastards(person in black and red)? They are looking for another bastard, the guide leader of the trip. keep looking...........can you see the crowds? they are waiting for the ferry...keep waiting folks! we move ahead first.Cya.
Reminder: Never take the ferry when festivals are on.in the ferry."can you see komtar?" i bet that, this was the question asked by them.because i used to ask the same thing before.haha....
the moment i stepped into the island of Penang, i had a strange feeling towards it. it seems to be unfamiliar to me, but it also hold the memorable time of a group of Friends who were spending most of their holidays here and even their farewell. Today, four of us, once again come back to this island as a group and this event will be recorded in the history of Moment.

1st stop..

'Seng Thor Coffee Shop' located at Jalan Kimberly,somewhere near Perangin Mall-Komtar. Tour leader's choice-so called the best 'o-chean' in town can be found in George Town. WOO....cant wait.....let's go.........

ok..this is none than the 'wantan mee' as one of the famous food in whole Peninsula Malaysia. ****kenny's choice. take a try of it, if u happened to come to this coffee shop.

here we are, the 'o-chean' or Fried Oysters. seriously, i it is the best 'o-chean' ever. The juicy mini oysters packed in the crispy fried egg-starch.really run out your mind if you had a bite on it.voted-***** out of 5stars.wow...must have a try.

while enjoying the delicious of the food, i had come across this, and i took it down...the classic cooking

ok..we are done..

let's proceed to the next stop!

2nd stop-Ayer Itam

once ayer itam has been mentioned, another thing you will think of are Bukit Bendera and Kek Lok Si...but, not this time in our trip.FOOD is the main purpose-allow us to bring you to the open air market of ayer itam. here, the best Penang Laksa and Curry Mee can be found.

here we are at the open air market....full packed...keep searching for seats........
yup. this is it the most famous curry mee. The stall...."lai.....Curry Mee no uaw!"

That's it the curry mee.Yummy! Red-hot Curry Mee......kenny's choice****

if it is too HOT for you, nevermind we have something cold to cool you down...

the ais kacang, the perfect match with the Curry Mee..amboi, sedapnya!
to be continue........have class to catch.cya....

up next Gurney Drive..........

happy raya

2007-10-13T10:32:00.000+08:00

before I'm off to penang, i would like to drop by and wish all the Muslim, Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri. And, to the visitors, Selamat Buka Selera.hahaha......

Also, to my closest Muslim friends Sazuan and Salma who are currently at India and Indonesia, Happy Raya.

Let me bring a mini celebration of Hari Raya of my university. let see what we got here.....

okkk...that's our celebration.haha.....

mama

2007-10-12T23:44:00.000+08:00

In a sudden, the feelings of mine become so emo, dull, moody……… and this causes me to keep wondering why it acts in such a way. The feelings just like a glass of cocktail, everything seems to be mixed together but I got an uneven mixture…… went up and down drastically in my brain. Wow, can’t stand it anymore. Then in the mist of this chaotic, I happened to be awake by a snap. And finally, I had identified what is the cause of all of those miserable feelings.
It is all about the reminding facts from the talk session I had with Shaun last night. It was a long and meaningful sharing with this friend of mine which we never had in past a year. Really appreciate that moment. And, through that sharing I just realized how far and how long I have been in this changing world. Although it is just 19 years, and it has been the first unforgettable 19 years of mine. All these years become dramatically fleshing back into my mind. Every single of scenes turns crystal clear back to my memory. It too, compacts every hard work I have done in order be I of today. However, it also reflects to me the journey will be in the future.
Consequently, an image come so clearly and took the lead of all to flow into my mind. Pause! It is the image of my mom. I can see all the images of her swiveling around my mind. And, its have shown an indescribable feeling towards me and all I can do is just mumbling without any word from my lip. What is that damn strong power resulting me to act so?
Refreshing! It is the love from a mother, or the mother love. This unshaven love had accompanied me for 19 years. Yet, sometimes I over look this love and never appreciate it. Maybe due to her position as a teacher who has many principles to follow, so I used to become rebellion towards her in order to escape from her surveillance. (In silence). I still remembered the time she caned me with her rotan and the sound of the caning still can be heard sharply. I was so angry and hatred towards the situation. And always asked myself, why she always put me into that kind of situation? Why my friends’ mom didn’t do anything bad towards their children? Why my mom needs to act like that? Why is she so different?.......and hundreds of ‘why’ had been asked during that time. Until once, I had disappointed my mom so deeply, and I happened to know how to answer back the entire ‘why’ questions I used to ask. (In dullness). At that moment, my ambition had broken down into pieces, just like a breaking glass. And only at that time I come to know the whole meaning of a proverb of Chinese which says beating is loving and scolding is caring. It simply means that, when our parents use physical punishment (beating) and mental punishment (scolding) logically is to care and love us more, not they want us to suffer from them.
I become so shameful towards my parents. I have owed them. And, out of a sudden I understand all these while why my mom was so strict towards me which I never take into account. Recapping! I still remembered the disappointed looking face and the speechless moment of my mom, and how displease she was in that time. But, what is done cannot be undone; this is what she had told me after that incident. She didn’t scold me for that and in my surprise was, she comforted me instead wanted me to do well in the future. Then, don’t know why my cheek suddenly got moisture, uncontrollable tear drops had moistened my face. I cried.
From then, I keep a promise to my self which states that I shall not repeat that incident again in my coming days. And now, I still keep it and forever, i will.
Mom, if you happened to see this page. I would like to say sorry for the past and also thank you for everything I had today. And last but not least, I love you, mom, before, now and forever. God bless you.
Besides that, I would like to dedicate this song to my mom and all the mothers in this world, ‘Mama’ by Il Divo.

"Mama"

[Verse 1]

Mama thank you for who I am

Thank you for all the things I'm not

Forgive me for the words unsaid

For the times I forgot

[Verse 2]

Mama remember all my life

You showed me love,You sacrificed

Think of those young and early days

How I've changed along the way

[Bridge]

And I know you believed

And I know you had dreams

And I'm sorry it took all this time to see

That I am where

I am because of your truth I miss you, I miss you

[Verse 3]

Mama forgive the times you cried

Forgive me for not making right

All of the storms I may have caused

And I've been wrong

Dry your eyes

[Bridge]

[Verse 4]

Mama I hope this makes you smile

I hope you're happy with my life

At peace with every choice I made

How I've changed

Along the way

And I know you believed in all of my dreams

And I owe it all to you, Mama

the Levites 2007

2007-10-11T16:54:00.000+08:00

It is all about serving God, who arts in heaven and sent His only beloved Son, Jesus Christ to die for our sin. Through the salvation of Christ, we are saved.
For the scripture said:
“Salvation is found in no one else,for the there is no other name under heaven given to men by which we must be saved.” Acts 4:12
In the Jewish tradition, a Levite is a member of the Hebrew tribe of Levi. The Tribe of Levi served particular religious duties for the Israelites and had political responsibilities as well. In return, the landed tribes were expected to give tithe to the Levites.
The Levites that I meant in this post is nothing to do with the Hebrew but the organization that served God. Levites is a Christian-based band formed by the students of AIMST as a body to serve Jesus Christ as their Lord and personal Savior. The band was formed in the month of March of 2006. Most of the members of Levites are from different batches of students of AIMST, they are the Foundation Studies students, Applied Science students, Dentistry students and Medical students. The first concert of Levites was held in Bandar Laguna Merbok Club House, Sungai Petani, Kedah Darul Aman. The mission that the Levites hold is to ‘band’ around Malaysia to serve Jesus Christ and spread the Gospel around Malaysia. The places that the Levites had visited are Bukit Mertajam, Setiawan, Teluk Intan and so on.
This October, the Levites had once again come back to this town as where it started it’s fundamental to ‘band’ along with Jesus Christ. The theme for this time is ‘Point of Break Through’. Here are the scenes presented by the Levites 2007.1..2..3..Action!

the intro......dancing queens!

the choir team

the lead singers........."at the cross i bow my knee.........."

the scathe............'with God, i can do it'

the sharing moment with Ps. John Kirby......'the love from God'

the peak...'one way'

yup...we were there....Shaun, Kenneth and I..........as camera men......

mission acccomplished.............yeah!.................see you, Levites in the coming days............

well done!

well.well.......... em that's all from me about Levites. Just hope that one day i will be with them.

God bless you all and may peace be with you always.Amen!

welcome to aimst

2007-10-10T01:13:00.000+08:00

i think most of Malaysians have a bundle of questions to ask when talking about AIMST University. so was i. before i get to know this university, i was in the same boat with them and i really had no idea regarding the presence of this university until my mom told me.and, since then, i started to explore this university and digging out all the information about it.and now, i am present in this gorgeous university.
there is a list of common questions usually asked by them whom do not know the university.
-what is aimst?
-where is aimst?
-why i never heard about it?
-what are the courses offered?
-does the university gt it recognition from the government, LAN, MMC or MMA and the other local or foreign Universities or Colleges?
-bla, bla, bla........................

introduction
the Asean Institute of Medicine, Science and Technology (AIMST University), founded on 15 March 2001, is a private university established by Malaysia Indian Congress(MIC). It is located in the northern Malaysia state of Kedah Darul Aman. After the starting, the university is formally operated on 30 October 2001.
AIMST first started to operate at Amanjaya Campus in Sungai Petani, which now is the old campus. Then, the University shifted to it's new campus which located at Semeling, Sungai Petani, also known as the Semeling Campus. At the location of 228-acre site at the foothills of Gunung Jerai in Semeling, the University self-contained and equipped with state-of-the-art teaching and laboratory facilities, the campus has purpose-built student and the staff apartments. the campus also consist of the Student Complex, Sports pavilion and the Experimental Theatre.
the university also established Facilities,viz: Faculty of Medicine and Health Sciences, Faculty of Engineering & Computer Technology, Faculty of Applied Sciences and Faculty of Business & Management. The University also set up Centre of Matriculation & Foundation Studies and Centre for General & Extracurricular Studies.

the master plan

the admin and the great hall

Courses on offer:
· Foundation Studies
Ø Foundation in Science
Ø Foundation in Business
· Diploma Courses
Ø Diploma in Physiotherapy
Ø Diploma in Pharmacy
Ø Diploma in Medical Lab Technology
Ø Diploma in Networking
· Undergraduate Programmes
Ø Medicine
ü Bachelor of Medicine and Bachelor of Surgery (MBBS)
ü Bachelor of Dental Surgery
ü Bachelor of Pharmacy (Hons)
Ø Engineering
ü Bachelor of Engineering (Hons) in Electrical & Electronic Engineering
ü Bachelor of Engineering (Hons) in Electronic & Communications Engineering
Ø Applied Science
ü Bachelor of Science (Hons) in Materials Technology with Management
ü Bachelor of Science (Hons) Biotechnology
Ø Computer Science
ü Bachelor of Computer Science (majoring in Software Engineering/Multimedia/Networking)
Ø Information Technology
ü Bachelor of Information Technology (Hons) (Multimedia Systems )
ü Bachelor of Information Technology (Hons) (Information Systems )Bachelor of Information Technology (Hons) (Management

OK...so after glancing through the info above, i think you all have the rough idea about AIMST. And, i think the doubts of you are mostly cleared by the data above.

although AIMST University is a young and fresh university(6 years old), it has the highly potential to be a world-class university and proudly shine upon in the map of the world. so, to those who are interested to become a doctor,dentist,pharmacist,biotechnologist and so on., please come and join us.haha.............

For more info, pls log on to http://www.aimst.edu.com.my/

tq.................

for the glory of 5I-2005

2007-10-07T13:39:00.000+08:00

the 5i folks......

here, i drop by, upon the request of my ex classmate, apple tan li pheng.haha.....
so, how should i get started on this page?
okk..i have the idea already.
it is another memorable time of my youth days, which is during my secondary school years. every student has to come to this stage,so am i. in my perspective, this is an important,happening and fruitful stage of our life.why do i think so?
1st-at here(beginning) we gain knowledge,friends(or even starts your puppy love,em..not necessary),experience and etc.
2nd.at here(bridge) we practice, learn, interact,discipline,been shaped,argue, challenge and other dozens of things.
3rd-at here(bridge) we start to appreciate.
4th-at here(ending) we start to split.
ok....till here, let us close our eyes. let our mind be calm and temporary forget everything in our surroundings. ok.then start to dig out the moments during the secondary days of us.refresh back, the moment of the first time we step into our secondary school. everything seems to be new.surrounded by strangers.after that, you go into your class and sitting beside a person you don't know him or her and staring to each other for a couple of seconds.since there, you two become friends. after that, the venture starts, we start to interact to the whole class or even the whole form, then the seniors.....and now be focus.can you remember the time we spend together to fight for our aim, doing activities, challenge each other, fight or argue among friends and the other ventures we had come across?pause!what have you seen my friends? honestly, i see joy. every single smiling faces of them had come back to my memory. 5I, friends forever!haha...................and now,let us see the moments in those days.

the class photo!

the "beauties" of 5I during Teacher's Day-2005

the farewell!! good bye 5I!!!all the best t all of you.............

ok, i think that's all i can do for you all, see you all in the future!

BY:

the genesis

2007-10-05T17:55:00.000+08:00

welcome to the Moment.

in this post, i will briefly explain the reborn of my, from a diary keeper to a new born blogger.so,please bear with me for a couple of seconds.tq.

the story flows........................

everything starts from the long passing break i had after my foundation studies. During past 4 months, my life routine is just eat-sleep-watch-hang out-eat-...........................can you imagine that period of time? what would you do if u had such a long break?

thus, as a way to pass my time, i start to review back the moments i had come across during the foundation studies year and try to restore them. and, this what i got.....

the memorable moments!

these pictures had brought me back to the moments we used to spend together in AIMST. sweet moments, bitter moments and lots of unforgettable moments we had during that time.every single of them flashed back and becoming fresh in my mind. and this had inspired me to record it down into my diary. but later, i become doubtful to my act of keeping these moments to myself and consequently a question had come across to my mind, "why don't i share it with my friends?" therefore, i start to blog as what i am doing now. and also, this blog is named as Moment after that transformation.hope you can enjoy it now and in the coming days.tq

blog vs. diary

2007-10-05T09:41:00.000+08:00

blog- an on-line shared diary
diary-written account of daily occurrences
so, what are the differences between these two?
OK....let us review back the two definitions stated.
blog- an online shared diary
diary-written account of daily occurrences
so, it had clearly explained the major differences between them.blog is an online shared information, which a blogger daily occurrences is shared and view by the others through Internet. Meanwhile, diary is a written account of a person's daily happenings into a note book, or typed and saved in his or her PC. this simply shown that a diary is more to a personal document and "private and confidential".

vs

blog--diary

sharing--self-centered

web page--booklet(diary)

reveal--conceal

socialize--0

comments--0

--etc.--

however, undeniable, blogging is evolved from diary writing. but,the world is rotating and things change accordingly.nowadays, people are moving more into sharing rather than keep things to themselves.so, evolve now and start to blog ahead.That is why, I'm here.